: )

Thank you for all the supportive comments! They made me feel so much better, as today was so weird. Seriously, I don't know what I would do without you girls! I feel like an alien around most people, and I'm glad this blog community is a place where we're actually the same as each other, and can support others when the outside world misunderstands what we have to do. Thank you. : )

I can't remember if I posted anything yesterday... I had that one semi-good day, as in staying within my calorie restriction, and I think I lost .6 or .8 lbs, I can't remember. Yesterday wasn't so good (after-work munchies are going to kill me!) and today hasn't been good either, but it hasn't been awful. I had a mandarin oranges and a kiwi for breakfast, then after school my mom got me some Chinese food (for fuck's sake!) but I mostly had cabbage and mushrooms, some noodles but not many... I just didn't even want to go there, y'know? And like... 2 sandwiches throughout the day that were probably 175-200ish calories. Day total? I don't know. Probably in the 800 range. And I'm in a good mood right now, so I refuse to let myself get guilty!

I simply haven't had the time to be as methodical or meticulous in my eating as I was in the post from the other day. I've just been trying to stay considerably indifferent to the food I'm eating. I'm not eating for the rest of the night, and this weekend I'm not doing much but working and practicing for an audition, so I'll have more than enough time to practice control in my eating!

GOOD NEWS though! I'm down a pants size! Well sort of. The size I have are too big, but the size down are a little snug in the waist (but fit perfectly everywhere else except being baggy in my butt and the back of my legs, which means that I apparently have a disproportionate waist and no ass). I bought them anyway! I felt so victorious. I think 5lbs and only washing them sparingly should make them fit perfectly! Haha.

No news on weight though. After all of my after-work eating I was too scared to weigh this morning, and I still have food in my stomach now. But my collar bones are getting more pronounced and I can feel my stomach shrinking! Seriously after having that month-long binging extravaganza my metabolism must have gone back to "normal" and now that I started restricting again I seriously felt I've lost so fast.

I'm getting kicked off the computer, so I'll have to read your beautiful blogs tonight! I love all of you!